Poem

I searched for Heaven,

Not long, not hard,

Not Dias rounding the southern tip

To find dragons and chopsticks and dynasties abroad

But I searched for him,

Lower case “h,”

In the sky, in the dirt

In the in between, blurred, fucked up space,

And he was gone,

Or hiding,

Or never there to be lost in the first place

he was empty and cold

And fell through my ribs from my heart,

Vacant from my soul

Until the books and the songs

And the clasped hands were put to rest,

Like the two-lined charm hanging

On someone’s chest

And meaning was lost,

Along with grace and creation,

And I no longer kneeled with one third

Of earth’s population

The open world above became gated

And locked,

And the key became useless and from the clouds

Was dropped